Well, I got summoned. I tried to get out of it but no such luck. Monday was my first day and consisted of sitting in the basement of the Tulsa County Courthouse. For 11 hours. With no windows. I felt like a vampire, minus the teeth and an insatiable appetite for human blood.
Finally, my name was drawn and I got to go upstairs to the courtroom with 39 other individuals. It was an interesting experience. The judge (who shall remain nameless) was a super nice guy and I will be voting for him again. Once we got in and seated, we were grilled on everything imaginable: beliefs, views, our past, etc. They didn't ask what my view on child molesters was so I couldn't go into dramatic detail about medieval torture. Crap. Needless to say, I didn't get picked even though my answers were well thought out and intelligent. Maybe too intelligent because the people that they picked for the jury were NOT the defendant's peers. Holy Toledo! If I EVER got arrested (which I doubt unless they have me practice medieval torture on a child molester), I can assure you that I would not want some of those people to be on my jury. Let's see...girl who had Vegas tickets and probably had to miss her vacation, guy who needed to pull up his shorts (Good grief, dude, NO ONE wants to see the color and style of your unders!), little old woman who couldn't hear well (EH? WHAT'S THAT YOU SAY?), man who reported seeing Bigfoot on his land ("Well, gollllleeee, sir. I thinks it was a giant ape with long arms. And it sings. And plays the Deliverance theme song on them there fiddle of his."). The list goes on and on and on.
They released me and the others on Wednesday morning. I returned to the dungeon and was dismissed for the week, along with all the other vampires down there. I am so glad that I didn't get picked to serve. It was a molestation case and I don't think that the judge would go for the whole "medieval torture" idea if the defendant was found guilty. And, because I am SO nosy, I looked up the case once I got home. Whoa. Let's just say that the verdict will be ALL OVER the 6:00 news next week. Sicko.
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